Confession of the day:
As a child, I used to think that clouds weren’t actually moving anywhere and they only traveled across the sky because the Earth was spinning.
True story.
Related:
Originally published on: May 9, 2013 @ 09:36
Confessions
Banana peels…
Confession of the day:
As a child, I used to think that slipping on banana peels was going to be a much bigger problem than it turned out to be.
* When I saw this banana peel in the gym parking lot, it immediately reminded me of a similarly themed meme involving quicksand. So yes, it is totally inspired by that — but also prompted by a real-life encounter with a banana peel. :)
Originally published on: Aug 10, 2013 @ 06:30
I’m no math whiz
C0nf35510n 0f 7h3 da4:
1 0nl4 pr373nd 70 63 900d w17h num63r5.
Originally published on: Dec 7, 2014 @ 17:40
Racecar
Confession of the day:
Sometimes I spell racecar backwards on porpoise just to see if anyone notices.
Racecar. racecaR. Racecar. Racecar.
Originally published on: Jul 4, 2014 @ 08:57
Risks of the job
Confession of the day:
Every time someone says “Let me grab my manager for you.” I picture them going into the back room and doing something they could get fired for.
Vik: Management through inappropriate acts – Chapter 1 “The Manager Grab”
Zero: …I suppose the alternative is you could ask someone to grab their manager, and when they get their manager, you can say, “That’s not what I meant.” And then they show YOU the exit.
Candie: Innocent-looking employee quietly approaches manager, gently cradles a buttock, and walks to their locker to gather their belongings.
Originally published on: May 28, 2014 @ 16:29
The speed of light
Confession of the day:
As a child, I used to think the speed of light was how fast you could flick a light switch.
True story.
Related:
Originally published on: Apr 24, 2013 @ 16:36
Being human (a little)
Confession of the day:
I sometimes write about the fact that not everyone you cross paths with in life will like you…
But it doesn’t mean it still doesn’t bug me (a little) when I discover someone who doesn’t. Or I write something that inadvertently offends someone.
Because it does (a little).
It doesn’t ruin my day, but it does give me something to pause and consider.
But I don’t think that’s necessarily a bad thing.
Well, unless you think it’s a bad thing. In which, OMG, I’M SORRY! Please don’t unfriend me! ;)
Related:
Stunning
Confession of the day:
When people refer to things as “stunning” and I am not stunned by those things, it makes me feel powerful because I am obviously immune to being stunned by things that are stunning.
“What a stunning photo!”
“Ha! I don’t feel anything! I’m unstoppable! MUAHAHAHA!”
Adulthood
Confession of the day:
Sometimes I feel like the “Grown up police” are going come along and revoke my status as an “adult”.
“I’m sorry, sir. You were caught pretending to be a Velociraptor and making weird dinosaur noises while shopping in the aisles of Albertsons. There did not appear to be any children around. We regret to inform you that Your adult status is being revoked. You will no longer be able to drive cars, stay up late, or buy as much candy as you desire any time you want.”
Aaaah! What a horrifying thought!
Related:
The molecular chemist
Confession of the day:
I’m no scientist, but this morning I discovered that it’s possible to bond a spider to a gym towel at a molecular level.
I’m sorry, spider. You scared the bejeezus out of me and I freaking panicked.
*Douglas Adams was right, though. A wise traveler always has their trusty towel handy.
Related:
- Spider? I ain’t afraid of no spider.
- The spider
- Coffee weaver
- Arachnid afterlife
- Whoa!
- Heebie jeebies mode engaged
- So I bought an old Geiger Counter off ebay…
RE: Douglas Adams – Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – towel
“A towel… is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have.” — Douglas Adams