Although I wouldn’t go so far as to call myself clumsy, I am occasionally a pretty “loose navigator”. As such, I sometimes bump into things.
My confession of the day is this:
Sometimes I bump into things and then I say, “What’s up?” as if that thing bumped into me.
Bump into a door: “What’s up, door?”
Bump into a tree: “What’s up, tree?”
Bump into a doctor: “What’s up, Doc?”
As far as inanimate objects go, it usually doesn’t progress any further than that.
Although there’s this one time I got taken out by a branch, in a jungle, at about 20 MPH, in Australia, on horseback, in crocodile country.
I ended up on my back with a lump on my shoulder the size of a golf ball. And the horse, although it didn’t actually stop after hitting the tree, ended up with a cut lip.
That was one heck of a tree.
Like they say, everything in Australia is trying to kill you. Although I can’t tell if it was the horse or the tree in this case.