The spider

Dear Diary


Sitting in my car in the gym parking lot — my laptop on my lap — when suddenly the ballsiest spider I’ve ever seen decides it’s just going to casually lower itself down from the sunroof to eye level — then stop, look at me as if this is not unusual at all, and basically say,

“Oh… didn’t see you there. Pardon me. Just coming through.”

I generally don’t like spiders in my space, but I had to give him credit for being so casual about it… I just did a catch and release.

He was all like, “Oh, thank you mister! Thank you.” And then he got run over by a car.

j/k. I let him go on a bush.

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