I thought of three more funny things to post today, but I’m not going to post them.
Because that would be too many funny things from me in a single day. And on a Saturday, to boot! O_o
I can’t be spouting out funny things all willy nilly. That would raise expectations. And then the volume of funny would need to go up.
And frankly, I’m not sure I can take that kind of pressure…
(Well, at least not until I’m getting paid for this. And then I will be as funny as you desire. But until then, I need to keep expectations low.)
So really, just don’t expect much from me and we will be JUST FINE.
Also, I didn’t write this to be funny.
So if you think it’s funny — even just a little bit — STOP THINKING IT’S FUNNY.
I’m serious. Stop it. (No, not you — the OTHER person. Yes, YOU. You are smiling).
Because if I inadvertently wrote this funny, then that means I thought of FOUR extra funny things today and I just used up one of them when I didn’t even mean to.
So this was definitely not funny.
Not even a little bit.
I see you still smiling. Stop it.
Smiling hours are between 9am and 3pm PST daily. Void on Saturdays and Sundays and where prohibited.
And if you’re in Australia… I don’t even know because you’re already like in the future.