I’m in a cafe. Sitting at a table with my laptop. An East Indian man in a suit walks up…
“Excuse me, sir — is the Internet down?”
What I wanted to say:
“Oh, no, my dear fellow. I don’t know what they’ve told you, but the Internet is UP and DOWN and all around you. The Internet is — everrrrrrrywherrrrrre!”
What I actually said:
“I’m not sure. I read the sign on the door, so I didn’t even try. I’m using my phone.”
I know — that’s not half as exciting and I wish I’d said what I was thinking!
THIS is why I NEED a time machine! Well, this and DINOSAURS!
Oh, and that time I spilled coffee on my laptop.
PS. They have a separate notice for their unvalued customers…
It simply says: No WIFI for you!