Life pro tip:
Sometimes you just gotta let the Wookiee win.
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Originally published on: Nov 24, 2013 @ 20:35
Life pro tips
Snapple
Life pro tip:
Since Snapple claims it’s “Made from the best stuff on earth.®”, if you want the best stuff on earth, all you have to do is buy some Snapple and reverse engineer it.
Or let someone drink it and then reverse engineer them.
You’re welcome.
From the comments:
Carl: “What did you build that bridge out of?”
“Snapple.”
“Oh good; it’s made of the best stuff on Earth. No doubt it’s structurally sound, then. Good work.”
Wait for it…
Life pro tip:
If you’re ever doing something and you don’t want it to seem like you’re making a lot of noise, just wait until a thunderstorm to do it.
Granted, you might have to wait a while, but this has the added benefit of teaching patience. And seriously, what’s so important you can’t wait until a thunderstorm?
Related:
Australia
Life pro tip:
When corresponding with your potential match and, in the course of the conversation, she asks:
“If you could wake up anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would it be?”
“In bed next to you.” is probably not as romantic as you first think it is.
Fortunately, there’s Australia.
Although, “In bed next to you in Australia.” probably won’t get you very far either.
Here are some more online dating tips (video):
A love for laughter
Confession of the day:
Whenever I read “I love to laugh” in online dating profiles, I switch it to “I love orgasms” in my head. Because hey, so does everyone else in the world! — And yet this simple switch feels fresher & more original. And it definitely beats out “I love breathing” in the “Things I like to do” category.
Life pro tip: “I love to have fun” is another great way to set yourself apart from the competition in the online dating universe.
Lifehack of the day
Life pro tip:
Combining laundromat day with cheat day means I can not only look forward to doing laundry now, it gives me something productive to do while working through my food coma. Zzz.
When the bank opens…
Even if you want to be second in line at the bank, it’s probably not a good idea to yell “shotgun!”