Planet Fitness perks

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Dear celestial body orbiting a star fitness people –

While Planet Fitness is known for providing black card members with some pretty amazing perks… massage chair, complimentary *car rental, free pizza, *free ipads…

I was disappointed to discover that the AbCoaster™ 3000 is not, in fact, a roller coaster, but an ancient torture device simply re-upholstered and rebranded with a modern name.

Might I suggest you consider using a less confusing name for this device?

My suggestion: How about The AbKillerPainInflictor™ 666?

Thank you.

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*may or may not be actual Planet Fitness perks