For sale: Time machine

Custom car alarms
E-receipts

for-sale-time-machine-zero-dean

FOR SALE: Time machine

Needs some work.

Please note, option to travel backwards in time is not an option with this particular model, but forward time travel is possible!

What’s wrong with it: A tiny malfunction in the system’s circuits is causing users to only travel forward in time at a speed relative to their perception.

I’m convinced this can be fixed (on the cheap), but I don’t have the tools or knowhow necessary to do it myself.

If you think you can fix it, I’m willing to let this go for the low price of $10,000.

Will consider best offer or trades. Let’s talk!

Read the comments on Facebook

Themes:

From the comments:

Darren: I want my money back. I bought this from you 3 years ago and fixed the reverse time travel. Now, it won’t go forwards in time relative to my perception. It’s broken. I have returned for my money, as you are incarcerated in the near future for false advertising and selling a time machine without a proper license. I accept PayPal.

Zero: I gave you your money back tomorrow. 

Darren: Right… hence the reason why I am returning this machine. BTW, sell off all your shares in Apple on March 13th, 2017

Dave: I time travel for free now. I fall into a deep, horizontally situated pseudo coma and when I come out, I’m some 6-8 hours into the future.

Zero: Any way you can let me know how you do that? Free, you say?