Cup-holder vortex

A bad day.
That embarrassing moment at the gym...

Today I have finally concluded that there are dormant gravitational forces between the two front seats of my car — specifically in the area surrounding the cup-holder.

And that these gravitational forces are only activated under two very specific conditions:

  • 1. There is a lidless cup in the cup-holder — and this lidless cup contains liquid.
  • 2. There is an electronic device nearby that is small enough to fit in that cup.

Under these conditions, the space between my seats becomes a vortex hell-bent on liberating the world of small, but proportionately expensive, electronic items.

In the past, my phone has been sucked into that space, but quick thinking on my part (mainly, “WTF, phone!? You don’t belong in there!”) managed to save and resuscitate the device.

I thought it would be the same with my beloved bluetooth mouse (“WTF, mouse!? You don’t belong in there!”), which I managed to retrieve in under 3 seconds. Surely a bluetooth mouse can handle being submerged for 3 seconds in water… but no.

Three days later and it powers up, but is done heeding my commands in any fashion that resembles heeding commands.

Blaaaaaast yoooooou cup-holder vortex!

*thinks “Now if I could only figure out a viable business plan that involved having people’s small electronic devices sucked to their doom in the space between the front seats in my car…”*

Oh yes! There is always opportunity in crisis!

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