Somehow the battery on my laptop always knows when I need it to last. So in an obvious act of spite, it always does the exact opposite.
This is evidenced by the fact that if I’m just putzing around, it miraculously turns into the poster child for the Energizer Battery Company…
If my laptop could talk:
“Hahahaha! That cat video was sooo funny! You wanna look at another one? Do ya? Do ya? Don’t you worry about my battery, Bubba Z! I’ve got extra juice in a hidden compartment for that!”
But if I want to actually work on anything that might be considered even remotely boring to anyone other than myself…
“I see you’re working on something important. — *yawn* — To be honest, I’m really not — *sigh* — feeling too well today. Feeling kinda drained. Don’t think I’m. Gonna. — *yawn* — Make…It.”
And then Windows chimes in…
“You think you actually have 10{82b2ded5ae086bbe31c001f0374079c9503b180ae813ec027549eb44365a9474} of your battery life remaining? You FOOL! Hahahaha. We need that TEN PERCENT of your battery life to shut down your operating system. I mean… we wouldn’t want it to just SHUT.DOWN…. would we?”
In the end, I’m not sure which is more evil. My laptop battery or Microsoft Windows deciding it desperately needs 10{82b2ded5ae086bbe31c001f0374079c9503b180ae813ec027549eb44365a9474} of my laptop battery power to shut down properly.
I’ll think on it.