Today’s cooking advice is brought to you by electricity.
How to Cook a Turkey by Zero Dean:
- Put turkey in oven
- Cook turkey until it’s done.
- Take turkey out of oven.
This cooking shit is easy.
From the comments:
Jeannie: Not even going to stuff it or put tinfoil over it or baste it huh? Congratulations, you just made Turkey Leather.
Zero: I didn’t say NOT to put tinfoil over it! I can’t spell out everything for everyone. You gotta figure out some stuff on your own.
Otherwise my cooking advice would start with:
- Wake up.
- Get up.
- Put some clothes on.
…
- Put turkey in oven
- You baste that turkey, you baste it good!
Jeannie: *Crosses off #3. *Apron only. More fun.
Zero: Nice. I like the way you think.
- Put apron on.
Not only is that more efficient than what I had, it also cuts down on laundry.