Dear stuff,
It would be a lot easier for me to find you if you would simply stay where I think I put you rather than wander off to some other location.
Stop doing that.
Zero Talking comics
A penny saved
Every time I find a coin somewhere, I pick it up thinking “It’s a sign I’m on the right path”. I’m not sure I truly believe it, but it’s always a reassuring thought at the time. Plus, a [coin] saved is a [coin] earned. I made 10 cents at the gym today!
Related:
UnUrban Coffee House
Walk into a kind of “funky”, locally owned coffee shop in Santa Monica, California.
This place has character. It’s also empty. Journey is playing on the radio. The Cashier hears me enter and greets me with a smile.
As I go to order, she puts her hand up and says, “Hold on. We’re having a ‘Journey moment’.”
I stand and smile. Moments pass. We just stand there. And finally The song winds down…
“Ok”, she smiles, “How can I help you?”
It.was.perfect.
Related:
Windows
That awkward moment you’re sitting at a table in a bookstore and an old man, sitting at a table next to you, is reading a book on Microsoft Windows and repeatedly muttering, “You have to be f****ing kidding me.”
Coincidence?
I think not.
Related:
Driving confession
Confession of the day:
Whenever I drive up on a curb, I pretend I did it on purpose. :)
Related:
Romantic to a T
I don’t care what you say, I think my new “Tell your boobs to stop staring at my eyes” T-shirt screams confidence… with a subtle hint of romanticism thrown in.
Humpty
Weird thought of the day:
I think the world would be quite different if more people were named Humpty.
Got flair?
I’m Thinking about growing a 70’s porn star mustache.
I think it might help.
It’ll be Like flair for my face.
Secret agent problems
If you’re a secret agent and I think you look like a secret agent, you fail.
Related:
Cheese balls
That awkward moment you discover where cheese balls come from.