Amazon prime


That awkward moment you can’t help but feel a little disappointed that the package you didn’t order doesn’t arrive two days after you didn’t order it.

*Note to self:

You can put as many things in your shopping cart as you want, but if you don’t actually buy them, there’s a good chance they won’t arrive.



Holy jumper cables!


That awkward moment sitting in your car in the gym parking lot (drinking your pre-workout drink) and a woman comes up and asks you if you have jumper cables. And you do.

And she’s elated because she’s been walking around for 10 minutes asking people.

So you help jump start her car.

And when you are finished she thanks Jesus.

But doesn’t thank you.


Now listen, I’m always happy to help, but it feels a bit strange to do all the work and then someone else gets all the credit.

I should’ve told her that Jesus is the one who left her lights on.

I’m the guy who had the cables and jumpstarted her car.



The lefty


At cafe.

One of the regulars and his wife walk in.

He sees me, smiling, “I see you’re a lefty today.”

No idea what he means, “What?”

“You parked your car in the other row today!”

Laughing, “You’re right!”

That awkward moment the former Mayor of the city not only knows what vehicle you drive, he knows where you typically park it.