Getting a grip


Weird thought of the day:

Whenever someone says that they couldn’t get a hold of someone, I picture lots of running, chasing, and grabbing…

“Yeah, those people in customer service were really hard to get a hold of. I chased them all over the store, but they were just so fast! And those that I caught kept squirming out of my arms!”

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Safety first


I see this sign, it says “Safety First” — and I’m like, “Has anyone ever actually done research clearly indicating that ‘Safety First’ is the best policy?”

I mean, doesn’t it kind of matter what you’re doing?

What if “Safety Second” is the best course of action?

I think I’m going to try an experiment…

First —

I’ll be reckless.


I’ll be safe.

And if I survive that experiment…

THEN I’ll be safe FIRST.
And THEN I’ll be reckless.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

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Plenty of fish


Plenty of fish in the sea, they say.

Well, maybe that was great like a billion+ years ago, but I’m kind of looking for a female land dweller now…

I’d even consider a cute mermaid — even if it meant I had to buy a house boat (and that’s a real long-term investment).

Although I am now wondering what mermaids eat… and if she’d be willing to adopt.

Ok, that’s enough thinking for a Sunday.

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