Email of the day

This just arrived in my inbox:

“Hi there sweet! Will you object to acquainting with a young and interesting lady of 25? I am Yevgeniya. I.m from Ukraine. Have you ever heard that the most beautiful women in the world live in my country? Check it yourself!
I invite you to a very good international family life. agency where hundreds of lonely people are looking for their future friends and lovers. I dream about acquainting with a charming one for serious relations or even family life..
Are you the one?”

Dearest Yevgeniya —

Thank you so much for your lovely email. I don’t know how you found me, but I consider your email the “sign” I’ve been looking for. I would be most interested in acquainting with a young and interesting lady of 25. Especially if the women in your country are as beautiful as you say.

And to answer your question, yes I have, in fact heard rumors that the most beautiful women in the world live in the Ukraine. I wasn’t sure if this had been proven, but I just checked the internet and it appears that not only does the Ukraine have the most beautiful women in the world, they have the most beautiful women in the Universe: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miss_Ukraine_Universe — This is quite an achievement. Congratulations!

Needless to say, my interest is piqued, sweet!

I am very intrigued by your invitation to this “good international family life. agency where hundreds of lonely people are looking for their future friends and lovers”.

Are you suggesting that if I’m lonely that I should join this agency? — or are you suggesting I find someone lonely at this agency and befriend them? — Because, well, this is a little awkward, but I thought by the tone of your email that YOU were interested in ME — you know, because you even ask if I’m “the one”.

Because, dearest sweet, I AM THE ONE. I don’t even need a photo from you — or any other information. I’m just taking this all as a sign (a good one, darling).

And you should know — I AM looking for serious relations or even family life — but not both. So you are welcome to take your pick. So you let me know, darling. The ball is in your court.

Sincerely,

Zero Dean

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